


i'm losing you and it's effortless

by ocdranboo



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Canon Timeline, F slur tw, Gen, Losing friends, the title is from a the fray song, uh evan is gay but its mentioned for .3 seconds also jared is gay thats just implied, vent fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-16
Updated: 2020-01-16
Packaged: 2021-02-22 11:21:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22282057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ocdranboo/pseuds/ocdranboo
Summary: jared's losing evan. he doesnt know where he went wrong.
Relationships: Evan Hansen & Jared Kleinman
Kudos: 10





	i'm losing you and it's effortless

Jared wanted to scream. 

He could feel Evan distancing himself from him and he wanted to fucking scream.   
They had known each other since they were seven years old. Evan was still very outgoing and Jared was scared to talk to anyone. Now, 10 years later, they both had crippling anxiety disorders, although they affected them in different ways.   
Jared could feel Evan drifting away, and when he asked Evan said he was "like this with everyone" and he was just "busy with the Connor project" but that wasn't true. He wasn't like this with everyone. He was closer than ever with Zoe. And even fucking Alana. Evan barely knew Alana, but the two of them were all buddy-buddy now and Jared? Jared was pissed.   
He wasn't pissed that Evan had friends. That was great. Fucking good for him. He was pissed because Evan was avoiding him.  
He was pissed because the other day at lunch he waved and smiled at Evan and then the other boy stared at him before walking away like he hadn't seen a thing.   
He was pissed because Evan was exploiting Connor's death for money. Because he was making Zoe believe Connor was someone he wasn't. Because he was building a friendship with Alana on a lie. He was pissed because Evan called Matt Holtzer a fag (and Evan was gay but that didn't make it better). He was pissed because Evan was a raging hypocrite. Because he was an asshole who bullied and put down others to make himself feel better.   
Fuck, man. Jared was pissed.   
Jared felt the rage of a million suns building up in him and he had to get it out before he couldn't, but he didn't know how, and so the anger just built and built and built and built.   
But he didn't know what to do.   
So when he saw Evan in the hallway, he kept his eyes up and ignored him.   
And Evan ignored him back.   
And that was just the way it was going to be. 

**Author's Note:**

> fuck dude Losing People Hurts. for no extra information follow me on tumblr @trans-zoe-murphy. for extra information message me. for to save 15% or more on car insurance get geico


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